hit by a school bus...a short one none the less

ortonville. some say this is the best place to be...well those who didn't go off to college. but none the less, it's a beautiful countryside resort that is the lost link between clarkston and goodrich. sure, for fun we let a cow loose on the football field and play bingo by guessing what place the cow will take a massive shit on, but we are all a bunch of hicks that have nothing better to do than drink and experiment with drugs...more likely pot, but now i hear that 6th graders are dealing coke like it's thier job. for fuck's sake, when i was in 6th grade i was still playing with barbies. i know i sound like an old timer saying this, but have the times really changed since when i was in middle school? i think that damn britney spears started all of this. she evoked small girls to dress like prostitutes and shake thier ass like they actually have a booty. fuck no. when i was in 6th grade, i thought i was daring because i wore tinted chapstick to school. nowadays, girls don't even hesitate to share a little crack (butt crack, that is) and wear shirts that leave nothing to the imagination. now, children are only innocent until they turn 4. after that, you might as well invite the tattooed biker freak into your house for dinner named "spike" at the age of 7, because you know that is who your daughter is going to be dating before she gets out of grade school. damn pop music and the negative side effects they have on society today. kids need to realize that dressing like ms. spears isn't all it's cracked up to be...and when they contract gonnohrea at the age of 9, it's no laughing matter. well, back to my main point, ortonville was a wonderful place until i graduated. and god bless those who grew up there that DO NOT think that it's appropriate to wear a g-string, boobie tassles, and stilettos to the local shopping center.
ending note: drugs are bad kids...that's why we college people stick to alcohol. it's cheap, easy to get, and we might as well put ourselves on the liver transplant list now...we will need one by the time we are 28.