Monday, December 10, 2007
that's right. it's been far too long since my last post, i almost forgot this place existed. during my almost 2 year break from blogger.com i have learned some things about myself that i will list in numerical order:
1. smelling scented candles makes me hungry.
2. college degrees do not ensure proper employment after graduation. thanks, cmu.
3. i love being a bartender. there's nothing like telling a customer to fuck off and still having a job the next day.
4. i still have a drinking problem. no surprise there, though.
5. jell-o wrestling should only be attempted once in a lifetime. twice, well, then, you're just a fucking moron. i guess i could be considered a fucking moron.
6. chili cheese fries taste the same on the way up as they do going down.
7. i should never procreate.
8. the original candyland board game is way cooler than the more modern version. there is no plumpy. how can we exist in a world where there is no plumpy? that furry fucking bastard...
9. smoking cigarettes does not make me look cool. jell-o wrestling in front of a huge crowd and then being hosed off half naked in the Whiskey's kitchen like cattle, does.
10. apparently i cannot dance. or at least a drag queen told me so. there is nothing like being put in your place by a "woman" who has "her" testicles duct taped to her leg singing "it's raining men."
believe it, bitches. i am getting back in to the swing of things with my passion for blogging. more offensive and pointless posts coming soon. blogging keeps the mind off of drinking. if only i could find something to cure my porn addiction.
1. smelling scented candles makes me hungry.
2. college degrees do not ensure proper employment after graduation. thanks, cmu.
3. i love being a bartender. there's nothing like telling a customer to fuck off and still having a job the next day.
4. i still have a drinking problem. no surprise there, though.
5. jell-o wrestling should only be attempted once in a lifetime. twice, well, then, you're just a fucking moron. i guess i could be considered a fucking moron.
6. chili cheese fries taste the same on the way up as they do going down.
7. i should never procreate.
8. the original candyland board game is way cooler than the more modern version. there is no plumpy. how can we exist in a world where there is no plumpy? that furry fucking bastard...
9. smoking cigarettes does not make me look cool. jell-o wrestling in front of a huge crowd and then being hosed off half naked in the Whiskey's kitchen like cattle, does.
10. apparently i cannot dance. or at least a drag queen told me so. there is nothing like being put in your place by a "woman" who has "her" testicles duct taped to her leg singing "it's raining men."
believe it, bitches. i am getting back in to the swing of things with my passion for blogging. more offensive and pointless posts coming soon. blogging keeps the mind off of drinking. if only i could find something to cure my porn addiction.
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